Modern Absurdist Pillows

Man begs with sign saying: 'Please help - Portable advertising fine to pay.'

G.K. Chesterton.

"I can't wait to post this."

Self-serve island

Crab with a clown face.

"Where is everyone?" "You had 'everyone' killed." "Stalin family reunion"

'Maybe it should be funnier...'

"Now that's what I'M talkin' 'bout!"

"Still Undecided Political Blocs"

"Nihilistic customer service"

Nonsense Poem

'Don't you have a better escape plan than that?'

'Today we will lock the monkey in a room...' 'Why do I volunteer for this?'

"Remember that ultimately we must answer to Chairs."

'If you want to hear the ocean, press one.'

'Could you ask him where he left the remote?'

'I predict that the next big trend will be spontaneous non-existence.'

I want to be a lawn!

Nikolai Gogol

"No animals were harmed during this performance!"

Grass: We lost some good men today!

No Double Parking

Crashed Aliens - "Miss Fortnum, come in here immediately..and bring the first aid kit."

'Now just learn to whistle and I'll be rich!'

Executioner forgetting his glasses.

Post Post

"I'm afraid the only thing we have in your line of work at the moment is a bingo caller in Milton Keynes."

"If you are a Pulitzer-prize winner, press 1. All others, please press 2."

"I'm so glad you suggested we insert his heart on Valentine's Day!"

The sudden extinction of Neanderclowns

Cakeless.

'We try to only make bad loans to good people.'

The End is Near. Have A Cone.

'This is the biggest belly button in the world.'

"It's good luck."