Model Railroads Gifts

"Actually, it doesn't contain a train -- just two stations, some track and a bunch of little plastic people standing around with clenched fists."

Angry White Males.

"The little engine that could... after taking advantage of family connections, a trust fund, working two years for free as an intern, and finally getting hired as an independent contractor."

'Have you been waiting long?'

'I thought you wanted him to have all the things you never had.'

Cloud Cuckoo Land, "Sometimes Doris wished that Charlie hadn't stayed so young at heart

Trainset

HS2 time bomb...

Coupler Counselling

Railway 'King' George Hudson

"A man and his choo-choo."

Secular Cloisters

The light rail system is reaching the downtown business core too quickly!

"I should have know he was a control freak when he seduced me in his signal box."

'When I started this journey I was a curate.'

"Hi! It's me...I've gone off the rails"

"Where did this thing come from? It's a major trip hazard if you ask me!"

End Of The Line

"I'd like a couple of rail replacement buses please. . ."

'I've been unfaithful to you - last night I slept with my train set.'

The little infrastructure that couldn't

"Beige Marks and Spencer anorak, elasticated cuffs, fully enclosable hood...I don't believe I've got that one"

'I understand you're looking for engineers.'

"Don't you love that new handcar smell?"

Model steam train pulls into a station

"It all started when we adopted a highway."

Clowns carry out railway line maintenance.

'Metro is a model transit system...ever since the funding cutbacks.'

Spiro & Pusho in the fast food restaurant.

"I don't know if you're aware of this, but we don't need GPS."

Replacement Bus Service

"Oh, those are the lobbyists who get us our government subsidies."

'I've had to put a major infrastructure project on hold.'