Mockumentary Enthusiast Pillows

The Prozac Story: 'It's a feel-good movie.'

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

'My imaginary playmate can whip your imaginary playmate!'

"Then one day, as I caught a tennis ball in midair, I asked myself, 'Is this all there is?'"

"Lori, go ahead and toss in 'Lolita.' Now, what's next?" "We'll need more lighter fluid." "'The Lottery' is devils work." "We must protect the children." "Book burning club"

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

"What do you mean blood sucking pest? You're the one who invited me into your life!"

"True, a salary cap on Wall Street may limit the talent pool, but, on the other hand, if they get any more talented we'll all be broke."

What happened when the bond issues failed during the building of the Great Wall of China: The Great Picket Fence of China.

World Food Summit - No food and drink allowed in the auditorium.

"I liked it better when it was 'don't ask, don't tell the New York Times'."

"I'm a common dolphin, I swim the west coast of Scotland foraging for fish and squid."

"We did our best for your husband but his poor old health insurance was too weak..."

So you'd like to be a lawyer...we require honest, genuine people, who are prepared to...learn how to fake sincerity.

"You work for the family business, and I am your father, not the patriarchal oppressor..."

"Ugh! Stop making a drama documentary out of a molehill."

'Not only can I not find the middle class tax cut, I can't find the middle class.'

"Apparently Wilbur hasn't gotten that raise. He's still hamming it up for the boss."

Militant Pacifists

"Cartoonist are harmless? Not at all!! These people have weapons!! Here, see for yourself!"

"I work smart, instead of hard. You do all the work and I take all the credit."

'This is a very dysfunctional company. No one will talk aboaut about the elephant in the boardroom!'

"Alright, fire me. But I'm taking back your "World's Greatest Boss" coffee mug!"

"My parents just raised my home school tuition."

Multiple personalities with blogs.

"Closing averages on the human scene were mixed today. Brotherly love was down two points, while enlightened self-interest gained a half. Vanity showed no movement, and guarded optimism slipped a point in sluggish trading. Over all, the status quo remained unchanged."

"Nothing like the History Channel to get you to appreciate these peaceful times we're enjoying."

I knew we were in uncharted waters when our chickens started asking questions like these:

"He can't speak to you at the moment - he's bonding with his compensation package."