Mobile Muncher Gifts

'Whoa! Our waiter's online and you should see what he's saying about your tip!'

"I don't have time for a TV dinner. I'll just grab a cell phone snack!"

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

"What makes you think I'm dripping it on my shirt?"

Gaston's Gourmet Truckstop

Full English Breakfast.

"Always faithful to arrive early and, of course, get the dibs on the jelly doughnuts."

"I just spoon-fed the media a pound of really old salmon."

'Vitamins A, B, C, D...Hey, Mom! - this cereal has all the recommended daily allowance of alphabet in it!'

'I see you're hacking the fridge again.'

Munch Master.

'You know, I could really go for a wafer-thin mint.'

'Hello, yes, I'd like to order 200 packs of the sweets you can eat between meals.'

Pizza and Related Searches.

"They're sound bites."

'Let me have 20% fat, 40% carbohydrate, 40% protein and a cup of tea,'

"The starred items are hot and spicy."

'Haven't you heard? We're not going to discuss the company picnic - this is the company picnic.'

Storefront reading "Net 'n' Nosh (Formerly Books 'n' Java)"

A vampire using ground pepper on his new victim.

"When you came down for a snack last night, did you see a plate of dog food in here?"

'OK, remain calm. Who's missing? Milk? Eggs? Cheese? Where'd they go? How much do they know? And will they talk?'

"Of course, he always says it's not fit for consumption. He's a foodie."

"The food must be good here. Look at the drool on the menus."

Motivation

"You asked for runny!"

'It's ten o'clock. Do you know where your willpower is?'

Santa contemplates whether or not to leave presents.

"Yeah, it's so much better than the Jung-and-Run over on 7th."

'Let's get these bite-size snacks to have with our bite-size news.'

"It appears it's middle was licked out."

"Since when can this company afford bagels?"

"No, honesty Billy. . . they don't use real dogs in them!"

Man eating 'after work mints'

'I'm highly motivated to diet. Unfortunately I'm more motivated to eat.'