Mixology Mavens T-Shirts

'If the country ran short of booze, do you think the government would see some of its strategic reserve?'

Dirty Martini.

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

'A cousin to the hammerhead, here we see the allusive, yet, handy, multi-use shark.'

Shaken not stirred

"The soup of the day is pineapple with a hint of rum."

Espresso Martini Peacock

"Call me Ishmael."

"That metallic grinding means her throwout bearings are shot. She's backfiring through her carburetor. The tick indicates transmission trouble, and the smoke means she's on fire."

'This is my new boat. I finally succumbed to pier pressure.'

Bertha's: A bank that's more than a bank. It's also an insurance broker and a beauty parlor.

'We're not exact clones - he likes his martini shaken, and I prefer mine stirred.'

"I knew a breakfast meeting would be a mistake."

Just married.

"Ma'am, do you know how well you were driving?"

"Let 'em try to regulate this!"

'I envy your metabolism.'

'If I were you, I'd leave the keys in the ignition and hope someone steals it.'

"Who needs therapists?!"

'The part of your brain you used to diagnose what is wrong with you is what is wrong with you.'

“It’s ok to leave the lid up at home but not on a submarine.”

Alcoholidays.

-"For instance, this gin and tonic does not have a single molecule of gin in it!" -"It's from the staff canteen, right!"

Isambard Kingdom Brunel

A Woman And A Man Discuss The Passage To America.

A pack of icebergs out hunting

"Two of everything he said, including woodworm!!"

Heyyy, don't worry about a thing. One more energy drink and I'll have you sliced and sutured in no time!

"Can you recommend a wine that tastes like a good beer?"

'OBSOLETE: Any really expensive Heating & Air Conditioning system you bought last year.'

Save the Humans.

"Oh my God, I HAVE to touch your hair!"