Mixing And Matching Ages T-Shirts

'I'm five, but I can play three to seven and a half.'

"Nice haircut."

Wedding Chefs

'We can't move in with my parents - they've moved in with grandma!'

Mary Margaret, the best bar nun.

"Don't you think even if there'd been no John Cardner and no Comon Cause, we'd have found each other anyway?"

Club DJ.

'You shouldn't be nervous about meeting my parents - you're more their age than mine!'

A statue of Mercury is defaced with a purse, stockings, a bra and lipstick.

'Until I met your Mom, yes.'

"'Till death do you part?"

"If there are no objections..."

'Will you marry us?'

'Your mother is not a good loser is she?'

"He's in his late somethings, but he's cute."

'Shall we have a small family Alfred? - I've got 10 kids from my first marriage!'

Nasdaq, Meshach and Abednego

"If you ask me, I'd say he was circa 1945 and she's circa 1965."

Technological Advances and the Experience of Age.

Caveman in office, "Miss Jones, come in here and bring me up to date."

'Crank it up, dude! I wanna see smoke comin' out of this thing.'

"...failing is ok."

"My kid form my first marriage? I thought he was YOUR kid from your first marriage."

'Just because your father and I have decided to get married doesn't mean we love you any less.'

"We need a bigger place for my kids and his kids and our kids."

Some old men are filthy with money or without money.

Global Skate Boards...senior discount: 'High school SENIORS, Dude!'

'Talk about a disastrous blind date: A quick look at her teeth told me she was a lot older than she said...'

"And those, I believe, are my stepchildren."

"I don't like it either, but since your mistress and my master are moving in together, we'll just have to get along..."

'He's messing with my mind. He ordered a plain donut and a chocolate bagel with sprinkles.'

'The top and shorts are a perfect match.' (Sales assistant to customer in a jigsaw outfit).

"You call this torment? This ain't nuthin'. You shoulda seen what this place was like back when I was your age."

GOP candidates arrive at perfect format for debates...

"I didn't realize it was dress-up Friday already."