Mixer Critic Gifts

'These geek mixers never work.'

"We just watched a hypermovie!"

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

No Elgar!

"Anna - there's someone I'd like to meet."

'OK, everybody...'Louie, Louie' from the top!'

"An everything Martini, please."

"Damn those dugout Martinis!"

"I like his earlier work better, particularly the ones I said I didn't like at the time."

"You know what they say, time flies when you're having rum!"

"The guy who wrote 'The Frog Chorus' is sounding kinda croaky."

"New studies show that the so-called 'lucky man' made popular by the prog-rock band Emerson, Lake and Palmer was, in fact, just very well-connected."

"I'm trying to write a drinking song, but I can't get past the first couple of bars."

'Because I'm so sick of those movies, now go get me a romantic comedy.'

"I'm astounded that your dog is channeling Eubie Blake! Has he never heard of Elton John?"

One-man band rehearsal.

'Row, row, row your boat, Gently down the stream...'

The Music Critic.

'Horace spends his spare time being a rock critic.'

"That damn dog's scratching again!"

"No, I'm still getting too much banjo."

Mega-Corp Pictures. This film will tell a story about Frederick the Great censuring one of his favorite musicians. "The Empire Strikes Bach"!

"I use to be a human beat-box but found it too humdrum."

Books and Phones

A singer being criticised

"Is that neat whisky?"

'I hate these purists who play Bach without any pedal'

"And now, Bach's Brandenburg Congerto Number One, first movement."

Hip-Hopalong Billy Bob blamed the censors for killing the country-rap scene.

Nun reading 'Halo' magazine

Mary Berry

"What do you mean, who are my influences?"

"Brothers, what we do in life echoes in eternity, if only through the lyrics of a Coldplay song!"

Snake Eats the Snake Charmer.

Books-CDs-Tapes.