Mixed Martial Arts Pillows

Two champagne bottles fight in a headlock

I love you. You're my everything. Mixed Message Arts.

"Hold on - the ref is checking the rule book."

"Maybe this isn't the right sport for you. What about cage fighting?"

UFC on steroids...

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

'I'm glad you guys could work this out in a reasonable manner.'

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

Overjumpers

Kung food restaurant (Waiter flies through the air bringing the food).

"Hi-yah!"

"It started with a mutual interest in martial arts and developed into an interest in marital arts."

"What's he going to do now, break wind?"

"What colour do you have to get before the big kids leave you alone?"

"Ninja bread men"

Man practising karate is tempted by a glass of beer.

Women's Martial Arts Center

Black Belt/Yellow Belt/Green Belt/No Belt.

Karataoke

'Remember me?'

"Full disclosure—I really need this hug."

'You may now kick the bride.'

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

"Impressive, yes, but what exactly is a black belt in cookery?"

Martial Arts

Mod Kwan Doh

'Not only do I have a black belt in karate, I also have a husband in the hospital to prove it!'

KAWAII T'AI CHI

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

Old Karate Master

'Oooh, Jimmy, the teacher put another throwing star on your paper! Great!'

Decapitated coffee.

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

"Today you will learn the 'Paper Cut' technique."

'I can remember when no one had even heard of t'ai chi.'