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'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

“She’s in her abstract expressionism phase.”

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

"I kid you not, blood was oozing from the walls! Unfortunately, it was fake: I had stumbled on the set of a horror movie..."

"I don't think I can express what I have to say in just colored paper and glue."

Billy, can you deliver your show 'n tell this time without the fog machine?

Halloween may be a little different this year.

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

Life Store Guide: Make-up and jewellery

"Whoa. Jeff. Looks like you got that job at the cosmetic testing lab."

"What's your project for the science fair, Arnold?"

Mini tennis players playing on table tennis court.

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!

"I've decided to cut out the middleman and self-publish."

'I ask her to make up her mind. So she powders her forehead.'

'You're much better than my mom. You can hardly tell when she paints her face.'

"Pssst! I had some CGI done."

'She dressed herself this morning.'

"Just ignore it. It's a mirage."

"Better luck next time, kid."

Only then, did Medusa realise her mistake.

"I feel bad for the companies that make lipstick."

'I did it all from memory.'

"Who's a pretty girl now?"

"I don't know what went wrong."

'The kids just love doing paint by numbers.'

'There! Now you won't get tangles!'

'You can come out, Marmaduke. I was just kidding about putting lipstick on you.'

"I'm not trying to be beautiful, I'm only trying to look better than everyone else there."

'I know I don't look like a matinee idol of yesteryear anymore, but neither do they!'

'It's more festive-looking!'

Woman applying makeup

Alien Beauty Magazine