Mindful Moneymaker Gifts

'In my years of meditation, I've concluded that being a prophet without profit is not the path to nirvana.'

Investments: Join out meditation group - 'Get in touch with your inner greed.'

"Those little voices in your head, Mr. Dunlevy. . . are they passing on any insider trading tips?"

"I've finally found a therapist who understands options."

"I'm trying to achieve total harmony of body, mind and cashflow."

"I was a stockbroker first, but when I realized how much time I spent praying, I figured, what the heck?"

'I'm finally at one with the universe...but apparently that doesn't include the DOW.'

"Stocks edged lower on the news there's more to life than the accumulation of material things..."

"We all go a bit crackers over Christmas, just try to pull yourself together."

"To mediate properly, you need a mantra. How about 'Ka-Ching'?"

'I'm beginning to think outside the box again - get my GP quickly!'

"I have this relationship with money, it's complicated."

'Frankly, I don't see a problem. By its very nature inherited wealth entitles you to be second-rate.'

Still looking for your inner-grown-up, Harold?

'Do you mind if I take the rest of my session to get your input on investor psychology?'

'I can feel it, Henderson - Someone out there is up to no good.'

"He's very well off. He's got all the quantities I admire."

"I'm hoping to sell my startup - a chain of fast-food meditation centers - to Google for seven figures."

Artist and the artist's model both thinking of the money.

'Nobody understands you. . . do you blame them?'

'I highly recommend this painting if you're into art as an investment.'

'How would you describe yourself?'

"The last thing I remember was asking my broker if all money had been in risk-free bonds."

"Guys, I can't afford to be laid off."

Unchanged … and yet completely changed. Tao Jones Indexes.

"Thanks to yoga, I now gently stretch to conclusions instead of jumping to them"

'Normally, Schowalter, I applaud initiative, but....'

"I guess I want what everyone wants - a billion dollars for being a jerk."

"And remember, son, perception isn't reality - money is."

'I'm thinking of starting a religion. What would be a reasonable initial investment?'

'I like green tea. It's the color of money.'

As your money advisor, I advise you to make more money.

"The big money is in development? Now you tell me?"

'All I want from them is a simple majority on things.'

"I'm working harder than I ever have, but all I get out of it is larger and larger paychecks."