Military Recruiter T-Shirts

"Tell me when it's all cyber warfare, and I'll enlist!"

"So what attracted you to us?"

Join the army: 'I'd love to - but I don't want to blow my chances for a Nobel Peace Prize.'

US Military Recruitment: Now Training - Drone Airstrike Operators

"Your resume is impressive."

"We need a new image..."

"It's a great extra recruiting tool. Those who know they can't live up to that quickly disappear."

Military Recruiters...Please help the George Bush legacy. Enlist today!

'I think we should stop talking about our target demographic.'

'A word of advice, Kowalski. Avoid using the term 'cannon-fodder.'

'What'll it be . . . too large or too small?'

'The Army Recruitment team gave him a white feather for not signing up.'

It's hard to commit to the army when they remember the dead and forget the living.

"And why exactly do you want to join the army?"

Would Obama let his son go to war?

"No, you can't write your own vows!"

'When do I get to see Paris Hilton like the recruiter promised.'

'And what makes you think the Guards would want YOU, laddie?'

"Atheist are hard to recruit! They hate foxholes!"

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

'This job is for a 30 hour week. . .but to achieve that you need to work 60 hours a week.'

"Oh, yes, and there's plenty of opportunity for advancement."

"Boy, am I glad they finally hired more staff!"

'Your resume is a little thin, but I like your willingness to be manipulated by upper management.'

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

"If this goes badly I'm going to post it on my youtube job interview bloopers channel."

"It's a heck of a tale...and well told, but we don't publish resumes."

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

Outer Space Outsourcing

'Very impressive educational background...now let's discuss WHO you know.!

'We should buy London and ship it to the States!'

"Welcome aboard, Bailey. Don't worry — they don't bite."

"No training period, but you can purchase my instructional video on line for $49.95."