Military Funeral Pillows

"So I'm flying over this funeral, and six men point their rifles at me and start shooting."

'I have to play taps in 5 minutes and I cannot find the CD.'

Support the Ex-Troops

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

Vehicles are having their own election. These are the candidates. The ambulance appeals to voters who think health care is most important. Voters focusing on education issues favor the school bus. And those wanting family-friendly policies are backing the minivan. The tractor is an expert on agricultural issues, and the import is a free trade advocate. Those voters concerned about environmental issues like the electric hybrid, and those wanting a strong military support the Jeep. What's t

"Don't you think it's time we talked about Operation Doug?"

Servicemen.

WW2 fighter pilot with emoji kills

"You do realize his ‘nose so bright’ is going to attract a horde of Defense Department drones."

HDQTRS division, Motor Pool and Covert Ops.

Military Medals

"In hindsight, we shouldn't have had him cremated."

He looks so natural lying there...

Decorated officer - 'And these are for keeping my pants up.'

"All we have left is standing room only."

"We must rise up and claim our rightful place at the table of society! We must never rest until we are given the respect and dignity we deserve! Chica power!"

'He loved that dog.'

Monuments

"We are gathered here to morn the passing of Bob Opossum."

'You can come down a peg. Mesopotamia gave the world bureaucracy, you know.'

Trump

"This just in... the country has adopted a 24 hr military clock... ...details at 23."

"Weather like this plagued my retreat from Moscow."

'There's too much corruption in the third world.'

'He was a great writer'

'I was in the catering corps.'

"No, you dismantle your nuclear arsenal first."

Infantry.

Armed forces waiting with nothing to do.

'At ease, soldier.'

'Trust me, you're not going to need an alarm clock.'

"David live a rich, full life, despite what his Wikipedia page says."

The dress uniform of the Catering Corps

Thank you to those who never came home and to those who never left their side.

"Remember when we had to get along on twenty-one dollars a month!"