Military Enlistment Pillows

"What's the biggest problem women have to overcome to fight in the front line?"

"But how can you be sure it's real love and not the draft?"

"Jeremy regrets joining The Swiss Army."

Did I hear right? Rudy's planning to sign up for the army? Its terrible. I thought: There's no way he'll do it. So why is he? The army's giving him a lot of concessions. We'll be in the same unit, right? Unlimited Xbox and bananas.

A Soldier's Conscience

HDQTRS division, Motor Pool and Covert Ops.

"Hi. What kind of wine goes with fruit salad?"

'Any wilderness skills besides making smores?'

'Trust me, you're not going to need an alarm clock.'

Oh, the armor is state of the art

Basic training w/ GI Joe, Rambo, Bruce Lee, etc.

"He reports to Grand Central Palace tomorrow."

War never felt the same after the Great Puppy Ambush.

'...and this is the Mess.'

A Rifle Competition in the North

"RAF Recruitment Waiting Room."

"Tell me when it's all cyber warfare, and I'll enlist!"

'This one is for Hide and Seek.'

"I've never liked 'im - he's an attention seeker!"

'Yes, I'm proud to say all my kids went into boot camp as soon as they left home.'

Didn't Ask, Didn't Tell.

"You don't think rum-filled centers would give his officers the wrong impression?"

"Oh yes, I proudly served."

"… and once you've finished advanced infantry training, you'll be assigned to film school."

"Cruz! Are you eyeballin’ me? Eyes shut during savasana! You hear me? Lance, get up and give me 10 headstand pushups to help Cruz here shut her eyes."

"I liked the one that saluted."

'Let me guess - You want to be a helicopter pilot?'

'Today we're going to simulate rough weather conditions.'

"Joining the Army was great for me son; he learned a skill and gained a world of self confidence. Of course, he still won't clean his room."

'Relax - everyone's a bit scared on their first raid.'

Forget about the college basketball tourney, endless drilling in 100-degree summer heat is the real "march madness."

Young man asking his governer to buy him a commission in the army

'What'll it be . . . too large or too small?'

"It's a great extra recruiting tool. Those who know they can't live up to that quickly disappear."

Adult Crime, Not Adult Logic