Mileage Tracker T-Shirts

Driver with Road Toll meter in car yelling 'How many more miles is it??!'

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

"Only three more miles and tonight we're good for tiramisu!"

'...so if we can save enough maybe, just maybe, next year we'll be migrating courtesy of British Airways.'

Currently Boston

"I'll get my 10,000 steps in tonight!"

Bureau to cut back on bureaucratic paperwork...

Explorer with enormous magnifying glass.

'He's very particular about how far we walk.'

'Frank, I think it's about time you bought another pair of boots.'

Snail Coach

Air travel isn't what it used to be.

"Honesty, I saw a train yesterday"

'Weird ... the footprints just seem to end right here.'

'The sedative wears off in an hour. With the attached transmitter we can monitor his trading volume and patterns, commissions and mating rituals.'

"...and you've got private use of it, so long as you don't exceed 10,000 mile per annum.'

'One small step for man. Hundreds of thousands of miles for my frequent flier program.'

A detective and a dog are tracing footsteps and dog prints.

"We'll let you know when we find your luggage. Meanwhile, you qualified for our frequent lost luggage club."

'Well, Mrs.Gurkemiller...Either your female cycle has turned to European summer time, or you're pregnant.'

'Trust me, the deer have been here. I see tracks everywhere... and look! Fresh droppings!'

'Dinosaur footprints!'

'No wonder you can't relax! Seven hundred miles in one day!'

'There's something about that Indian scout I don't trust.'

'I looked into their eyes before I shot them, with my high-powered rifle, from half a mile away.'

"Howard may have a few miles on him, but I'm not ready for a trade-in just yet."

"It's this marvelous little liberal-arts college in Kansas that gives frequent-flier miles."

Climate change meant that Norman was often finding his quarry far from the traditional hunting grounds.

'Boy, look at the size of those tracks. I bet he will go 300 pounds.'

"Well done, yes, it's a skunk scent. Concentrate though, can you smell the faint trace of perfume? It's a female skunk..."

'We'll put our horses in 'Do Not Track' mode by going through this stream bed.'

"Somehow, this just don't seem sportin', Jake."

'To tell you the truth I don't what it is.'

'Took me all night to write that message.'

"Want to know how many steps we took?"