Midnight Planner Gifts

'And don't forget. That credit card will expire at midnight.'

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

"Honey, do these sweatpants make me look like I prefer we stay in tonight so I can watch the game?"

"I'm busy this afternoon, but I can crayon you in for Saturday."

Wine Selection 'Here we are. Our cheapest house wine. Would the gentleman care to smell the twisty cap?'

"Honey, I don't want to hide anything from you. I collect pictures of cats in my spare time."

Dating is so expensive...

The Pill-of-the-Month Club!

'So, what's for dinner ...a séance?'

"We have a song, but neither of us can remember it."

Funnel of Love

'Harvey, did you notice what a beautiful full moon we have tonight?'

"Do we go out or do we stay home and open a can of worms?"

'You deserve some unabashed fun once in a while.'

"I think we've had too much Wine. The cork-screw is surrendering."

"It's a Haiku Dinner."

'A rose tattoo for your lady friend sir?...' A female Tattooist offering a rose tattoo, in the way of the old Rose Ladies in clubs and pubs

'You wanted to go on a romantic outing. You're on a romantic outing.'

"What kind of biscuits are they?"

'I was so embarrassed when you tossed your y-fronts on stage.'

"On time arrival...check. Paid for drinks...check. Made pleasant conversation...check. Didn't stare at mole...check."

Restaurant in the Strand.

"Hello ... Susan ... Joe ... Not ... Make ... It ... Me ... Joe's ... Robot ... Me ... Programmed ... Take ... You ... Dinner ..."

"We'll go out for a quiet candlelight dinner, slowdance on the beach to the music of Barry White, then make love in a warm, cozy bed!"

"Game of checkers? Okay, but I'm watching every move you make."

Bowling. 24 Lanes. Going bowling for date night with my girlfriend as a bad idea. A split was inevitable.

Romantic Frogs

"Okay then, what wine do you have if we go up to the four dollar range?"

Romance

Colin kept a notebook by his bed to write down any ideas he had during the night... "Genulph hyu donkey slapperthwaite."

'Jingling your change won't get us a better table.'

Couples Massage