Midnight Meditators Gifts

"I'm not sure if this is getting through and I don't know what time you finish for the day...."

"Why is it always me that has to get up just as I'm falling asleep to do things I forgot."

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

Yoga with Baby

"WOW, we're on top of the world!"

"Look! A dying brain cell! Maybe we should help!...."

David Attenborough's Morning

"Come off it, you're not working from dawn till dusk: You're working at dawn and at dusk..."

"Would it be possible to speak with the personality that pays the bills."

"How does one experience the ultimate selfie? Swallow your cell phone."

'When I need to think better, I just step outside.'

'Sweet dreams buddy!'

'I seriously doubt if you've attained Nirvana yet - You've only been fasting and meditating for fifteen minutes.'

Nervous Buddha

Insomnia.

Yoga Dentist has sign on wall: 'Open Mouth Insert Foot'

"The meaning of life is cats."

'I'm going to the library to study, so don't wait up.'

"Damned if they do and damned if they don't? This is BRILLIANT work, everybody! Why didn't we think of this before?"

'Oh, he's pretty wise -- I clerked for him.'

Lovebird and the Song Birds

'I'll be in Florida for the winter, but I've sublet my cave to a pair of nice Mormon missionaries.'

"No, there's nothing wrong at my job. That's what's got me worried."

"Oh great!...He;s a fitness guru!!"

"We prefer our idea people to present their ideas during office hours."

Man is pulled in all directions.

"Do you have anything that will help me get rid of an irritating mantra?"

"It's 2 A.M. Do you know where your p***s is?"

"The magical time of night when the artist awakes, not with any idea, but with the murky recollection of an idea from the previous day that was not written down and is now lost forever."

Bob begins every day with Tie Chi

A middle aged cow.

'Maybe you just weren't cut out for enlightenment.'

'We only get an hour for lunch, so your best bet is to brown-bag it.'