Middle-age Humorist Mugs

Dad Socks / Dad Sex

"Good news, we found a plant the cured baldness."

You say you had a misspent youth? Yeah, and I'm doing my middle age on credit.

Live: Middle Aged Men

Middle-Age Superheroes

"I used to drink to forget. Now, age-related, short-term memory loss takes care of that for me."

"Whenever it comes, Glenda, my death will be untimely."

'I washed the gray right out of my hair, but now I can't get the gray out of my tub.'

"It's not so much a minivan as it is a hearse for our youth."

"Do you have any books on releasing the tiger within?"

"Can't we just go after sailfish...?"

"Actually, I'm pretty sure aging naturally and aging gracefully are mutually exclusive."

"Norman still has seventies flashbacks sometimes."

Short on top, medium on the sides, and not bald in back.

"My inner child just turned 62. Where's his money?"

"I don't think your old sports jersey shrunk. I think you grew."

"You boys who have to take your medications with food, now's the time."

'of course it's not natural: He dyes his mane to cover up his grey hair...'

"What do you mean, 'I'm in good shape for a man of forty'? I'm only twenty-six!"

"Warren's too cautious to cure his mid-life crisis with a motorcycle, so he's rebelling by driving shirtless."

'Face it dear, we are as old as we look!'

"I call him auction man - his hair is going, his teeth are going, his sex drive has gone."

"Tell me this is just your mid-life crisis."

Listen, you're fine. Lots of people your age start fuhgeddabouding things.

'Dang.'

'She says her wrinkles are laughter lines, but nothing is that funny!'

"When you talked me into eternal life, you left out the part about menopause."

"He's at that funny age. It takes twice as long to get over a good time, as to have it."

'He's in a male 60 panic mode.'

"It's the Florida kid."

'I suppose they call it 'Middle age' because that is where you age shows...'

"How do you know my wish didn't come true."

Same Sexless Marriage

"You're not losing your hair Dad, it's right here in your comb."

"I'm going to need a hug, Maurice - it's from the A.A.R.P."