Metric Marvels Pillows

Drat. Your bolts are metric,but my tools aren't.

"Where's the business end of this thing?"

Repurposing the aqueducts of Ancient Rome.

"It seemed like miles to me!"

Motivation to work

'I know we're inchworms, but let's get into the spirit of this! Change is good!'

',,,And we'd really like a heart for the Tin Man,,,'

"And so if the pillage numbers don't improve this quarter, I have just one word for you: waterskis."

Poetry repairman

'Mom, dad's toasting the new year with the car again!'

'Hi Terry. Quick question about that new gearbox you put in my Polo last week.'

"I like wine gadgets more than I like the wine!"

Hectare?

'Bad news, Dr. Treemont...It needs an engine transplant.'

Things move fast round here! Including the new processor!

'Mac works on cars strictly for his own amusement.'

"I like the metric system. My weight in kilograms is less than my weight in pounds."

"A man and his choo-choo."

Clown on a motorised unicycle.

'Darn good oil that!'

'How do you measure the success of your blog?'

Robotics, Inc. Warehouse. It doesn't make sense. Those two call in sick more than then other humans, but they appear to have fewer moving parts.

Elevator Repair School. First thing, forget the old saying "What goes up, must come down"!

'Yes, my good man, we'll have the '02 Vin de Table - and make it the 1.5 meter bottle.'

'The volcano is in the shop.'

Aqueduct

Swiss Army Tank.

"When dealing with Americans, refer to the heat in Celsius. They hate that."

"Your car is always in the shop because it has a problem with its auto immune system."

Chicken Engineer

'Appleton! Go in for Ludwig!'

Steeplejack.

"I dumbed it down."

'Well, there is definitely water in the carburettor.'

'We're gaining market share in the areas where we lose money.'