Merry-go-round Lover Gifts

Carousel Ponies.

Why Cupid is not allowed to drink alcohol anymore...

"Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Fred, Sam, Brian, John, Walter, Jeff...."

Boyfriend scores notches on wall by bed.

'I even love the way you snore!'

Call it Tough Love.

Nurse drawing a smiley face onto a man's stomach.

Valentine's Day calls for a romantic candlelight dinner and soft music. Then a trip back to my place for some heavy groping and groaning.

"Can we role-play a couple who are too tired to have sex?"

"We're not all grim you know - I'm a happy reaper."

"Are you certain that we have already detected all types of quarks?"

"Ooh, this one sounds interesting, 'Single, vegetarian, bulbous, with moves like a lava lamp'."

Humpty Dumpty is sitting on a wall, Below is a man with a boiling pot waiting for him to land in it, Man is licking is lips, he has napkin on and is holding a knife and fork,

Candles In Bed

'Oh that?... It has nothing to do with the formula; it just makes the whole thing seem less grumpy.'

Your shoulders are like silk. For some reason, when my skin crawls, it feels smooth.

'Don't worry about it, nurse. Mr. Jones is one of my private patients.'

Velocirappers

'This is the part of the job I hate.'

"Sorry! There's been some mistake. It's elves we're looking for!...Elves!"

"He has a limited vocabulary - but boy, can he kiss..!"

"I'm just thinking about how much money we saved not going abroad."

"Mrs. Ross, may I make a suggestion?"

"Call me!"

Always looking for ways to increase sales, the creative team at Mayflower Greeting Cards brainstorms new sending occasions.

"Hon, it's been more that four hours. Shouldn't we call the doctor?"

Santa and Eyechart.

'Will you marry us?'

"In my day, this was our fidget spinner."

A Redneck Christmas

Merry and Bright!

"I'm not saying you're making it up but I think I'd remember if I'd stepped on your face."

"Naughty or nice? I thought in a post-fact world, anything goes?"

Reindeer Tryouts Today Only

"I thought you only came once a year."