Mercury Muser T-Shirts

'Have you noticed that Harry has a twitch and is as mad as a haddock? Do you suppose it's mercury poisoning?'

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

'It's midnight, do you know where your brain is?'

"It isn't much of a dragon, but then, she wasn't much of a maiden."

'Are you not thinking what I'm not thinking?'

Shoot For The Moon

Changing Room Decisions

"Lighten up! Your charts aren't that bad."

God's map of the universe

A sailor in his little yacht bobbing on the waves

'No, this is area 50...Area 51 is over that way...'

'Can Mr. Sloan call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

'My acne is worst on the dark side.'

". . . And how long have you felt alienated?"

"Someone to collect your works, dear."

'It's called doctor-patient confidentiality. In layman's terms, you're paying me to keep my mouth shut.'

"If I didn't worry all the time what would I do with myself?"

"You've got to want to connect the dots, Mr. Michaelson."

'I don't know - asceticism just doesn't seem like ENOUGH any more,'

"You're everyman? But I thought I was everyman."

"Oh, that's my cousin. I'm the Bluebird of Mid-Life Existential Despair!"

'I was happier when I was unhappy.'

Analyst has an ink blot on a card for a head.

'Well the GOOD news is that the new software analyzed hundreds of thousands of potential customers to identify any that would have a genuine interest in the product...'

"You've got an inferiority complex, alright, but what's worse is...it's not a very good one."

An enlightenment seeker heads back from Truth lookign shocked.

"Can't you ever relax?"

Covid 19 Variant

'It's my dreams: I find them offensive.'

Barbershop customer's reflection mocks his haircut.

Good golly! I'm some kind of bird!

"And then it hit me: I got up early for THIS? A slimy, cold worm? I HATE worms!"

"If a stock falls in the market and no one's around, does it really lose its value?"