Merchant Navy Gifts

'I want to be the first mountain goat to sail the seven seas...'

For his next book, he would write an epic novel of the sea.

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

Servicemen.

When laundry ruled the waves.

"As I was only saying the other day..."

'Maybe it should be funnier...'

"Then, after college, I joined the navy. Wait, I think I hear him coming."

'If we get out of this alive, I'm going to have a darn good look at your resume.'

Armed forces waiting with nothing to do.

Sea weed harvest.

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

"You may be in love, but can you support my daughter on what a herring makes?"

"There she be, lads, the special economic zone!"

COWMIKAZES

"Captain, we've taken on strippers."

"And you guarantee it's free if it isn't delivered within thirty minutes?"

'So, what do you want to talk about?'

"It's the most hostile takeover I've ever been involved in"

Tugboat tugging Iceberg

On the plus side, I'd wager a lot of you folks back there had never seen an iceburg up close before.

"Oh No!!!...Cap'n...Iceberg...Dead ahead!!"

"Before we made the leap to cyberspace, our stockholders made us promise we'd maintain a traditional street presence, too!"

"Today's numbers. . . seashells up one, lobsters up three, claims down one, mussels up one . . ."

"We're gonna make, Rose! Keep washing your hands!"

"Call me Ishmael."

London merchant telling a young employee that if he does not change his behaviour his career will go badly and he may end up becoming mayor

'It was only a joke. I never thought they's accept me.'

"You're absolutely sure my wife won't be able to find this?"

"Sir, our hood ornament is slowing us down."

Admiral in the bath.

'We're drifting apart.'

'As a young rat, I traveled the world as a stowaway on a merchant navy ship...'

The grazing deck of the Titanic.

Ocean Liners will be Ocean Liners