Menu Sleuth Prints

'What's affordable tonight?'

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

"‘Extra vile old ox’? No, sir – it stands for ‘extra virgin olive oil.’"

"Is the MSG local?"

"And how is last week's tilapia tonight?"

"Are these prices?" "No, that's our Calorie-fixe menu."

'How is the water prepared?'

"For dessert, absolutely no flambé!"

The Huge-Underground Vat theory of why all wonton soup tastes exactly the same.

'I have a bad feeling about this place, Watson... and I smell a rat!'

"...I should have seen it coming...The busboys, the waiters, the dishwashers, the maitre d', all stealing shrimp, caviar, lobster, but ah, the strawberries, that's where I had them?"

"How would you like your soy protein, mixed tocopherols and methylcellulose patty?"

"Sure, ha ha, it’s all ‘free-range’ beef."

"How 'local' is the fish?"

"I can't have anything that's a food."

'Today's entrees are the Breast with Thyme, and the Wurst with Thyme.'

'Today's special is yesterday's left-overs.'

"We know you boosted that milk truck!" "Admit it or we'll take a bite outta you!"

"Our greatest fears are confirmed, they've taken waffle fries off the menu."

"Oh, there will be an investigation!"

'This is not Hungarian stew.' 'We ran out of Hungarians.'

"I can highly recommend the peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich, served with a chilled glass of milk."

"Our menu never claims that our meat is barbecued. It just says that it's covered in barbecue sauce."

"It's a cucumber mousse with a mushroom roam, but at least your bill will be substantial."

'Which are the most popular and least popular items, and which have been on the menu the longest and shortest times?'

Horse meat scandal.

'Of course you can't have the chef's salad. What will the chef eat?'

'You're lucky you can't read.'

'It appears that 'reduced fat' means high fat, 'lo-fat' means plenty of fat, and 'fat-free' means some fat.'

'Police. We have reason to believe you've been hacking into your neighbor's computers and stealing their recipes.'

'Fish fresh?' 'I don't know I've only been here two weeks .'

Waiter, there are tiny bubbles rising to the surface of my clam chowder. Conclusion" there's a flatulent fly in my soup. ? ?

'Don't rush me. I'm adding up the calories!'

'There's a lamb chop in my soup.' - 'Oh, that's where it got to. It belongs to table six.'

Guess Where Your Dinner Is?