Menu Magpie Gifts

"Soup du jour..." - "Soup du Siecle"

"Stephen and I are today's special."

"Is the MSG local?"

Party time.

Fast Food Menu Selections

'It's the essence of springtime. You're really enjoying it.'

"You ordered the organic, unprocessed, whole wheat spaghetti?"

'How is the water prepared?'

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

"Tell me what you think of the menu. I wrote it."

"The secret of my success is combining eggs, meat and bread in enough ways to make an eight page breakfast menu."

"For dessert, absolutely no flambé!"

"The Halloween Special is the pork and kraut. It'll come back and haunt you."

"Just so I’m understanding the menu, the ‘Old Forge wheel with rosemary-infused pancetta’ is essentially a $36 Hot Pocket?"

"....and hold the garlic."

"Oh sorry, those are the Ten Commandments. Hang on, I'll get you a menu."

'Physical or Social Science?'

"I'm a strict vegan with dietary limitations due to specific food allergies. What should I get?" "A taxi."

'Would Sir & Madam per chance care to peruse the scratch & sniff dessert menu?'

"Seat yourself. Grab a menu. Take any table. Hey, you know how to cook?"

'Today's entrees are the Breast with Thyme, and the Wurst with Thyme.'

"Do you have something for somebody with no palette, no taste and no money?"

'It's beans OR toast, not beans ON toast.'

"Our menu never claims that our meat is barbecued. It just says that it's covered in barbecue sauce."

"And here you have a brown thing next to something greenish, with some sort of brown runny stuff underneath it."

'Which are the most popular and least popular items, and which have been on the menu the longest and shortest times?'

'Carb or non-carb section?'

"You didn't say 'excellent choice' when I ordered! What did I do wrong?"

'I'll have the frogs legs - and make sure they're kneeling.'

"You get free veggies when you order meatloaf -- We call it the 'peas dividend.'"

A la Carte