Meme Connoisseur Pillows

Angry at the World, Happy About my Stock Portfolio

"The Internet puts the world at your finger tips."

"It's nothing personal. I just enjoyed your online presence better."

Trump Sides with Russia Against USA!

No, you idiots, they don't include a "comments" section.

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

"Greetings, I'm the bluebird of dank memes."

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

New and improved! BunkerBuster! Get out of the sand trap every single time - or your money back!!

Help! I'm ROFL and ICGU!

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

Girl with smart phone enters door that says "Social Media Studies"

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

'He likes to power nap.'

'Bert's dog training.'

'Tony, you always try to lead.'

"Hey, pal, let's hear 'Doggie in the Window' again, and this time play it like you mean it!"

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

Night of the Latkes

Giving birth with your husband present may be more painful.

Farm Humor.

"You know, there are other emojis."

"Dear Wendy, please excuse the tardiness of my response to your recent tweet from Hoboken."

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

"Stinkin' fake news!"

The Trojan Beagle.

Happy Hour

"You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the heck else are you talking... you talking to me?"

"And I'll have that lightly sedated, please."