Joke Connoisseur Pillows

"I'm trapped in an elevator - wait, it gets worse."

"I asked for a Hexagon and you built me a pentagon - of course you cut corners!"

"Gracie, I have a good riddle for you!"

A man on the corner sells 'Lead Balloons' with a sign 'Lead Balloons great for parties!'

Freshly shaved ham.

"When did this game get started?"

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

"Why do they do that?"

New and improved! BunkerBuster! Get out of the sand trap every single time - or your money back!!

Zoology Class. Test Today. What did you get for the question about Fuzzy Wuzzy?

'What did one flea ask the other?' 'Shall we walk or take the dog?'

"Hey, pal, let's hear 'Doggie in the Window' again, and this time play it like you mean it!"

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

'He likes to power nap.'

'Tony, you always try to lead.'

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

Night of the Latkes

What's normal?

Farm Humor.

"The tests confirms you have short-term memory loss."

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

The Trojan Beagle.

Happy Hour

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

"And I'll have that lightly sedated, please."

10 Good Things about a Minnesota Winter.

"The yellow spotted green bird, eats its body weight in bugs, and mates once every three years."