Meditation Lovers Gifts

'My name is John and I haven't had a think for 36 days.'

As they gathered for the three hour meditation it was clear that some students were less prepared than others...

'Oh, he's pretty wise -- I clerked for him.'

Nervous Buddha

Retrospect Road

Cleaner hoovering under levitating guru.

'It's my mantra.'

Upside down sign offers Yoga Classes.

Yoga Dentist has sign on wall: 'Open Mouth Insert Foot'

Lotus Celebrate: We start out in life radiating a youthful energy and natural glow.

"Son, it's time you learned the benefits of sitting around doing nothing."

'The creative process works best with a relaxed brain, so I'm letting my mind wander to let a solution drift in.'

"Ooh, ooh, I know this koan! I got it! Pick me! Pick me!"

"And these are the Fab Four Noble Truths."

'Hey! Contemplate your own navel!'

"Oh, ah, sorry!"

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

'Oh, crap.'

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

My God, I need to fart.

Unguided imagery

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

Zenemies.

'I'm going to have an out-of-body experience -- can I bring you anything?'

Meditation

"Showoff"

Trivia Night in Apartment 8-G

'I'll be back in three or four months - Hold that thought.'

'I hate to tell you this, but enlightenment just isn't for commuters.'

"WOW, we're on top of the world!"

'Oh dear! -- Well, look me up if you ever get reincarnated, okay?'

'It says, 'Life is like a transistor.''

Taking a little mental vacation can help as long as you don't go to mental.

"Look! A dying brain cell! Maybe we should help!...."