Medieval Stories Mugs

"Mummy was right: - I should've married the dragon...!"

A dragon relaxing in a chair staring at a taxidermy knight's head above his fireplace.

Dragon roasts a chicken impaled on a knight's sword.

'No big deal -- I'm just going over to Parliament to break a tie.'

"Oh no, I'm not the Lady of Shalott, I'm just the Lady of Plain Old Onions."

"I definitely said I needed a BOLD knight..."

King Arthur on the lake trying to open letters when the lady of the lake offers a letter opener.

"I'm sure you'll grow into it, darling."

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

"What sorcery be this? Thine castle is bouncy!"

Society for the preservation of dragons - "You don't want them to become extinct do you."

Knight Golfing

Lady of the bath...

"You are being overly-defensive again, Brenda!"

'OK, so I fumbled. Now can you cure it or not?'

"Early model of baggage claim"

'The siege is working my lord. They have food and water but no beard oil. I reckon they will surrender in 12 hours or less'

Joust Sharpener

"Honey, where did you put my Green Lantern cufflinks?!"

"Whosoever slays this dragon may marry the princess."

'Too late...looks like they've already been pillaged.'

A bridge builder using an organic blow torch.

"I hate it when the damned things decide they need to get out and burn off some calories."

"It isn't much of a dragon, but then, she wasn't much of a maiden."

"The previous tenant was a bit of a shut-in."

The Beard in the Stone

Missing You.

Castle, Cafe + Gift Shop.

In case of emergency - use tin opener...

'Actually, there's no interview necessary. Just pull out the sword and the job's yours.'

'I suppose you think that's funny.'

Dragon Recycling the Knights it has defeated

'MUM, go and get Daddy, there's another knight coming: This is so much fun!'

"Dare I ask for mustard?"

"There isn't a siege. We're all in line for the bouncy castle."