Medical Muse T-Shirts

'Yes, we can run a few tests if you insist. But, I'm pretty sure that my initial diagnosis is correct.'

'Honey, I wish you wouldn't bring your work home with you!'

"She fell down stairs again, so this is her third hip."

Message in a bottle being read by a fish

'It's easy, Greg. Just get in touch with your inner regional sales manager.'

"If I turn it up I might get out of here quicker!"

"..Your analysis and medication would be perfect if you were a goat."

"I think it's wrong to hunt them when they're in a house of worship."

Jerry Lordan

'We don't have an opening at the moment, but if you'll wait one minute...'

Painting the portrait of a weight lifter.

"I knew there was something wrong when he stopped reading the obituaries."

Happy Mothers Day

'Actually, the entire novel is a metaphor of me getting rich from the movie rights.'

"Okay... how about some people are poverty rich but asset poor?"

'How come there aren't any peace heroes?'

"I'm leaning towards cake as the new global currency...but are you sure these are our best options?"

Dog Statue

"In a nutshell Mr. Beesley, you have hypochondria."

Delta and Omicron Race

Always let you conscience be your guide. I let my conscience be my guide, but it's non-binding.

Man pondering signpost reading NHS and Complementary Medicine.

'I see a change in matters of the heart, liver, kidneys. . .'

'I think it's called RED!'

An octopus admiring an inkblot painting

'They say medicine is a calling. . . but it's days like this I wish I'd had call waiting.'

'My financial philosophy is a cross between Harry Truman's 'the buck stops here,' and Ronald Reagan's 'trickle down.' It's 'the trickle down stops here.''

"My whole life, …. I've never wanted to be anything other than a psychiatric patient."

A woman is staring at someone's feet when they are in an MRI machine.

"I'm thinking of getting out of medicine completely… or volunteering in a third world country to do my liposuction."

"It's just what I suspected: Obstruction of Justice."

"It was the best of Starbucks. It was the worst of Starbucks."

'Nobody understands my job title.'

'Shouldn't a cultural center have more to it than video games?'

Woman lying on a couch admiring her portrait.