Medical Mischief Appreciator Pillows

"Time of death, 11:55." "Wait, what?" "No, sorry, my phone died."

'You have a strawberry on your nose, I'll give you some cream to put on it!'

The obstetrician doesn't need a close catcher...

Mayhem, Inc. Part 15

"Heart transplant surgery waiting room"

'You're supposed to bring the newspaper to ME!'

'I thought my appointment was for a TB screening.'

"We'd like to run a few tests on you to work the kinks out of it."

"Cat with nine still lives"

"Here's your sweater back."

Eye, ear, nose, throat and loans to pay the bills.

'I hope you all appreciate the irony in this.'

"Yikes! Okay, I'm going to pretend I didn't see this."

Birds steal sleeping girl's shoelaces.

Less expensive equivalent.

'Yes doctor, it did hurt when you did that!'

"It's inoperable and perennial."

Dog steals a cricket ball.

"When they develop their own gravitational field it's a clear warning sign of getting type 2 diabetes."

White cat on top of a Christmas tree.

Doctor, I can't feel my legs! I know you can't, I had to amputate your arms.

"It happened either over the weekend or when I left the office today for lunch."

BEWARE! Cheshire snake in the grass!

OPERATING ROOM, 'Your husband may have a little trouble sleeping for awhile -- we spilled some coffee in him.'

Obstruction of justice? Yeah, I can give you something for that.

"Hey, were it up to me, you'd be here for another few days, but then I'm not your insurance company."

'I'll take #1.'

'She said she was made out of sugar and spice, so I bit her.'

Good Kitty No More.

"You have what we are going to call Klitson's Disease, Mr. Klitson."

'You are a very good doctor. You're actually listening to what I'm saying.'

"Trust me I'm a Doctor."

"Now, those pills you just took may produce some visual side effects."

'The only thing wrong with you is that you're holding up my golf game.'

"The bloodwork came back kinda yucky."