Medical Appreciation Pillows

The Children's Hospital

'You have a strawberry on your nose, I'll give you some cream to put on it!'

The obstetrician doesn't need a close catcher...

'Hello, I'm Dr. Frank Stein and this is my anaesthetist, Dr. Ivan Gore. We'll be doing your hernia operation tomorrow.'

"I hope you don't mind - I'm training a brand-new assistant and I've asked her to check your blood pressure."

"Heart transplant surgery waiting room"

'Long shift?'

"Turn your head and cough."

"We'd like to run a few tests on you to work the kinks out of it."

Covid vaccines

'You don't have a heart murmur, but your liver is muttering.'

"You have a heart murmur and I'm starting to hear your liver and kidneys complain."

"Can you recommend something for the attorney who got me everything?"

Eye, ear, nose, throat and loans to pay the bills.

'I hope you all appreciate the irony in this.'

"...I'll send you for an amniocentesis."

'No we don't have any fly vaccine yet - how about something for anxiety. . . we have plenty of that.'

'My 'friend' has this problem, Doctor!'

"It's inoperable and perennial."

Paramedics.

"I THINK I've got an app for that!"

"Yikes! Okay, I'm going to pretend I didn't see this."

Nurse holding giant pill tells patient, 'Relax. It's chewable.'

'Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun.'

"When they develop their own gravitational field it's a clear warning sign of getting type 2 diabetes."

'Something needs to be done about the surgery room lights.'

"Next time you give CPR try not to use your tongue."

"It happened either over the weekend or when I left the office today for lunch."

"You have what we are going to call Klitson's Disease, Mr. Klitson."

'You carry a rabbit's foot — well, that explains the rabbit fever.'

"I can't believe school ends in three months! Sometimes I wish it would never end. But I guess endings make you appreciate the present."

'And this one is for going into an MRI machine -- alone.'

"Trust me I'm a Doctor."

'You are a very good doctor. You're actually listening to what I'm saying.'

'The only thing wrong with you is that you're holding up my golf game.'