Media Studies Gifts

Strictly off the record.

"That was Brad with the Democratic weather. Now here's Tammy with the Republican weather."

'Typical media bias. First they label the wolf 'the big BAD wolf' then they only give Little Red Riding Hood's point of view.'

"No comment."

'We'll be back, after this commercial break, with more reasons why its not safe to leave your house.'

Slanted media coverage.

"Young people today need heroes - that's why I hired a P.R. firm."

The first green shoots of recovery.

Funny how it's only the people I disagree with who are biased.

"Geez, you're the worst focus group I've ever seen."

'Hey, that line's moving a lot faster!'

"TV violence made him do it. Says he'll name shows if we drop the charges."

'Forget about 'who,what,when,where,why,how'...Instead 'Will it sell papers...attract advertisers?'

LIBERAL MEDIA POLLS, 'Do you think President Obama is doing a great job, a wonderful job, or an absolutely terrific job?'

'Mr Campbell, complete the saying 'there's no smoke without...'' 'Mirrors.'

Humility Monthly magazine: Featuring Our Person of the Year, Bud Blevins!

"I regret that my poor choice of words caused some people to understand what I was saying."

Public Relations: Today's Lecture: Weapons of Mass Deception.'

'Next...an in-depth report on corporate corruption - excluding, of course, our parent company.'

Problem Page.

"You're suffering from defective media image. What you need is a spin doctor."

'We've got truth, we've got enlightenment, and we've got serenity - what we NEED is media coverage.'

'He's really putting that media studies degree to good use.'

The Media Guru: 'You don't exist until you're on TV.'

The 24 Hour 'Celebrities' Careers Going Down the Drain' Channel.

Water-main break - "Very serious." - The Times

A series of cameras go through a war zone.

"Your Honor, we feel the trial failed to deliver on its pretrial publicity."

"Nothing wrong with half-truths...you still have 50% to manipulate."

Information manipulation

"I hate this news channel! It's giving me information when what I want is affirmation!"

Media Talking Heads.

'To avoid lawsuits tonight's news will not name names.'

'Do you want to watch the, 'everything's terrible' cable news or the 'everything's wonderful' cable news?'

Department of No One Could Have Anticipated.