Medal Chaser Gifts

Gene doping in sport.

'It is this celebrity culture, they won't do anything by practise medal ceremonies.'

I love gymnastics

Dog Olympics

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

Brian was very proud of his dog.

Military Medals

'I was in a camouflage unit, so this one is for Hide and Seek.'

"I always thought I'd be good at getting drunk and crying on camera for Bravo."

'Why couldn't you throw like that in the game?'

"I guess I was a good shot, because I took down 50 Nazis...all by myself. That's how I got my silver star. Honestly, I don't consider myself a hero. I consider myself lucky."

"Yoo-hoo. Fifteen minutes of fame is about to start."

"The first one is for graduating from basic training. The rest are classified."

School Career Choices: Celebrity chef, celebrity gardener,celebrity plumber, celebrity vet, celebrity painter & decorator. . .

'I was in the catering corps.'

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

"He wanted a heavily decorated cake for his birthday."

'All right!! Bull's-eye!'

Strive to win!

Planting a Flag on the Summit

A backup plan might be a good idea, in case 'being a celebrity' doesn't work out...

Jungle Games

Happy Champion

Hollywood or bust!

Sports Memorabilia: Help wanted-losers need not apply.

'Son...old soldiers don't die...they just get medal fatigue.'

'So, ten thousand pounds could be yours if you call in and answer this question...Why the hell aren't you in bed?!'

"It's OK vicar, Nigel's just having one of his panic attacks."

'My blog has been favourited over half a million times but still no book deal!'

"IBS isn't all bad. It was largely responsible for me winning 6 sprinting medals in college track."

Sports Fan - Whoever's Winning

And this one i got for properly polishing my medals.

"Are you sure he tested negative?"

"They called me Dumbo. A memoir of redemption."

''Because It's There' got us up here...you have any ideas how we get back down?'