Measurement Meister T-Shirts

"Build it 300 cubits long? I thought you said centimetres!"

"Measure twice, cut once...and curse three times!"

"It seemed like miles to me!"

'I know we're inchworms, but let's get into the spirit of this! Change is good!'

The Tale of the Tape of the Tail.

"You're right -- this town is big enough for the both of us."

"The hardest to convert are inches to centimeters."

"The official measure of an inch is three iPhones stacked on top of each other."

"That's it - I've had it up to here with measurement devices."

'Uh oh, I measured the lumber in feet, but you measured it in metric.'

"I can never go metric. 'Al's 30.48 Centimeter Hot Dogs' just doesn't sound right."

'What's a cubic foot?' - 'Whatever it is claim compensation.'

Cubits? Haven't You gone metric yet?

"I like the metric system. My weight in kilograms is less than my weight in pounds."

"It kind of puts it all in perspective, doesn't it?"

"We're all metric now..."

Whatever ran over the poor guy really left some marks. Tape measure.

'I regret to report that there's no global warming threat after all -- we just got Fahrenheit and Celsius mixed up.'

'Absent any details, in purely visual terms, I like it.'

"Well done Fred, you've lost a bit more..."

I've got the latest geezer-jargon translator app.

"When dealing with Americans, refer to the heat in Celsius. They hate that."

Time Scales

Warranty Void

"I am sorry to inform you that you are displaying early signs of senile dimensiona Mr Johnson."

'I thought you said 36 inch neck and 16 inch sleeve.'

"Once again, the answer is no."

'Got a quarter?'

'We're gaining market share in the areas where we lose money.'

"I bought a metric scale. I'll no longer be disappointed with my weight because I won't know what it means."

The why-can't-this-event-be-in-miles-like-other-sports-on-this-country 10K.

37.85 Litres Hats

30.48 cm Hot Dogs

The Why-Can't-This-Event-Be-In-Miles-Like-Other-Sports-In-This-Country 10K

'Looks like he's hitting his targets'