Meal Experimenter Pillows

Though he created more than 300 products from peanuts, George Washington Carver was unable to change even one of them back into a peanut.

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

"First cook the cake, then apply icing sugar and candles..."

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

Cookbooks

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

"I'm afraid it's not cheese, it's 'cheese-like'."

'White smoke means she decided what to cook. Black smoke means it's done.'

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

'Thank you so much, but I just followed the directions in the cookbook.'

"Still haven't quite figured out the pressure cooker, huh dad?"

'Seven layers in one dip? Gentlemen, what have we wrought?'

"Looks like it's time to make the banana bread."

Culinary Breakthroughs During Social Distancing

Sm. Pepperoni & Mushroom Cloud

Things to do while you're stuck at home during the coronavirus crisis.

A dozen predictions for foods of the future.

"Who shaves the fennel in your family?"

The Inexperienced Cook

"Then add one extra large egg..."

'Lets all thank Martha for her very innovative 'Hot Dog Crepes'.'

Junior Masterchef - "Darren Smith and I'll be cooking chicken nuggets with Mars bars in a CocaCola sauce"

'We can always cook it one half at a time.'

"She's my hero. Life gave her lemons and she came up with pomegranate cranberry lemonade."

'We're losing the mid-morning market. Let's put a hamburger in a glazed donut and call it brunch.'

'We call it the 'Tomato Surprise' because the chef tinkered with the DNA a little.'

'Remove the fur and claws and these genetically engineered apples taste just fine.'

'Flipping pancakes.' 'Waiting with a net.'

''Spiced mill cider and home made apple pie.' Am I supposed to freshen the room with this or have it for dessert?'

'Would Sir & Madam per chance care to peruse the scratch & sniff dessert menu?'

"How would you like your soy protein, mixed tocopherols and methylcellulose patty?"

"Some protein with my salad? Sure, put a 24 ounce Ribeye in it."