Mba Student Gifts

'If it's any consolation, our lack of business innovation will be the subject of analysis in some of the finest M.B.A. programs in the country.'

Business Cliches

'one of our major contributors suggested we add a Scared Straight program to our MBA curriculum.'

Creating dummy corporations for dummies.

East is East, West is West, Business is Business.

Business Class Flights

The MBA Draft

"We're a monopolyopoly. Our company that owns 13 subsidiaries which put on a darn good imitation of competition."

Robot Parts $5

"When faced with a tricky ethical issue, I always ask the question, 'What's in it for me?'"

Business of Fingerpointing Line Art

'I ace 'wheeling' but I flunked 'dealing'' - Boy on leaving Business Administration.

'It's okay. We'll just push our retirement plan back a bit.'

Business Admin - Group Think 101.

I was trying to day trade my way through business school, but then the stock market tanked.

"It's simple supply and demand. The shorter the supply, the more money we demand."

"So you're interested in medicine, public relations, business, contract negotiations and insurance law? Which one will you study in school?"

"I've got an MBA. Massive Business Anxiety."

'What was Marx's theory of the origin of capital?'

Business School. Our case study is an umbrella company bankrupted by fabric costs. They were killed by high overhead expenses!

"So how much money have you made from your psychic hotline business?"

'I have an MBA, but I've never MBAed.'

"Now that I've made that perfectly clear..."

The Genghis Khan School of Business Skills

Our parent company is not pleased with our work. They want all of us to register for a few remedial MBA courses.

'That's the first nickel I took in!'

'The price of a stock will fluctuate on these three factors...'

Atilla the Hun's Business School

Investing 101 Acronym Test.

'...All profits are local.'

Monkey Business College

'I guess we should have expected a seasonal slump.'

Business 101

Student about Biz Quick class: 'It's bite-size information in a 15 minute class that teaches you how to roll in the dough.'

'Welcome to the Business Ethics course. Today we're going to start with the basics.'