Mathematics Instructor Gifts

“Today we are going to be learning percentages.”

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

"But everyone is befuddled by math."

"Oh, stop it. You are not at all obtuse." Complimentary angles make the other angles feel good about themselves.

"If a third grader knows the answer, how much of a problem can it really be?"

'X is unknown? Even to somebody with all your education?'

A=Pi r 2, 'All this stuff about 'pie are square' makes me HUNGRY!'

Pi Ala Mode.

Math 101, for those who can only count to 100.

'It was bound to happen - they're beginning to think like binary computers.'

A Major Refresher Course is in Order.

"Sorry mum, but I just don't get the decimal system..."

"If x is the set of all men that love you, then I am a member of x."

'Recalculating...recalculating...'

"He was the one everyone called 'The Greatest.' Then one day, a stranger turned up in town."

"I know it may be wrong, but it's how I feel."

'And what part of the formula don't you understand?'

"I'm going to prove that Math comes in handy later in life."

"Arithmetic gets a lot harder when you run out of fingers and toes."

"I was planning to grow old with Matthew Nelson, but it looks like I'll be growing old with my algebra teacher."

"It's called geometry, Mum."

'Single math professor in search of an intelligent woman. Send an example of your favorite equation.'

The theory that ‘Time is Relative' came to the professor during a Decelerated Math Class.

'Maths is fun!'

Graduation Speech.

Counting part time employees is the new math.

When Cells Divide

'Shouldn't we spend a little time on the ARTS?'

'Unemployed math grad. Will solve quadratic equations for food."

"Don't blame me for the grade, blame Google's algorithms."

Math Teacher

'If 'x' is unknown, why should I rock the boat?'

Staff Yearbook