Math Joke Enjoyer Pillows

When statisticians argue.

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

"Oh, stop it. You are not at all obtuse." Complimentary angles make the other angles feel good about themselves.

A=Pi r 2, 'All this stuff about 'pie are square' makes me HUNGRY!'

"Actually, the job calls for someone who is convex."

Computation Lite, 13 Computations Than Our Regular Formulas.

'If your cell phone has five hundred minutes, and you use one of them during this class, how long will you be in detention?'

Complimentary angles make the other angles feel good about themselves.

Entrance code to MENSA club - 'To enter, simply type in the square root of Pi.'

'I don't know if you're a mathematician but my wife's not happy with her Poisson distribution.'

'Oh, we don't actually teach math any more ? we found it was too hard on the kids' self-esteem.'

'Hell's freezing over. The only thing I can figure is that Professor Crenshaw finally traded in his slide rule for a calculator.'

With the aid of an abacus, Elizabeth Barrett Browning counts the ways.

The geometry of everyday life

Mobius Comic Strip.

The irony is that Euclid himself is way out of shape.

'We're going to need a bigger basket.'

"Pi and mash squared please."

'My husband always loves your Poisson distribution - it's something to do with being a mathematician.'

"I'm sorry, Sam, but all of this doesn't add up to a hill of beans."

A Wrecked-angle.

A=Pi r 2, 'All this stuff about 'pie are square' makes me HUNGRY!'

"Fever, chills and dizziness. Sounds like you have a Math test at work today."

Figure of Eight

"You know what we call a number that won't sit still?"

"Is x the wrong angle?"

'Everyone says 'business is business' - But has anyone ever checked the math on that?'

Hillary's New Math

"For her birthday I bought my wife an abacus...

"Can't hear it at all, miss."

'Assuming, of course, that a woodchuck could chuck wood.'

School janitor empties numbers out of math room waste basket.

Psychiatric Clinic. Take a Number. 27. "Take a number"? --- But I have math anxiety.

"I just couldn't conjure up the answers."

"How do we know this isn't a ponzi scheme?"