Martyrdom Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Joan's minor case of heartburn seemed rather insignificant considering her current situation'

Thomas Becket

"The university said he was a climate change denier so remove the statue."

Frederic Auguste Bartholdi

Juggler and Illusionist

Looks Like They're Finally Renovating The Toilet

Monument in the park for Squirrel Feeder

'Well, he's always been a hero to me.'

"All right, let's clam up, everybody. Here comes another expedition."

Veterans Day '20

"It had to go - there were historical links with slavery."

"It's badly sprained, McElroy, and you know as well as I do that I'd only slow you down. Go on without me—and that's a direct order!"

Two men wearing laurels and holding hands

"It's a blood curdling novel about the brutal murder of a publisher who rejected a book about the brutal murder of a publisher..."

"I dropped my goblet!"

'I'm death for goodness sake - why do I have to adopt a more healthy lifestyle?'

Eldon E Furse and his attorneys

B.O.H.I.C.A. Memorial

"We think we've found the murder weapon Sir"

A statue dedicated to "The Unknown Academic Infighter" stands outside a college campus.

"Who do you feel like pooping on today?"

The Spring Break Venus

Michelangelo's David

Alaskan Cryogenic Society.

"That's perfect! The bloody door is too small!"

Easter Island

The Venus de Milo after vandals put a prosthetic arm on her.

"Everyone is so cynical these days."

The Thinker and The Reactor.

Quentin Tarantino

'I'm the one who sold King Tut his tomb. The commission was huge.'

War HeroWar Exit Strategy Hero.

The Butlers Ball.

"Of course it's depressing. It's supposed to be depressing. It's a tragedy."

"I see many military victories, a heroic death and a grateful nation that will erect in your honor a statue that will be dirtied by pigeons every day, once and again."