Marshmallow Toasting Pro T-Shirts

'The Torch Holder'.

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

Marshmallows

Harsh Mellows.

Peter Pan, the Utensil that Never Grew Up

"Dad! Dad! It's freezing out here! I wish we had a fireplace to get all cozy and roast marshmallows!"

Champagne

"My calculations are complete. We could toast 12,000 marshmallows every day for every person on earth for 36,000 years with one solar flare."

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."

'Aren't these marshmallows just going to make us plumper for when the bears ultimately eat us?'

"I don't know, maybe I'm just being mallowdramatic."

'Marshmallows ready! Now for the roasting...'

'Your father's a genius kids. First he discovered fire and now marshmallows.'

The lesser known active volcanoes.

Pint

Mr Jefferson Brick Proposes a Toast at the 'Rowdy Journal' Offices

Love wine

"Really? You mean you’ve never smoked a joint?"

The Burning Bush: How God convinced Moses to Lead His people a.k.a. the origin of s'mores.

"He must be a pro. He's got his own stick."

"You're in luck. A slot for you just opened up in our kitchen."

1% Cereal: Now with marshmallow dollar signs.

"To toast!"

"What would you serve with toast?"

Pint

'Our fifteenth anniversary -- the adventure continues!'

Wine Lovers

Marshmallow Roast

Emergency box in woods contains supplies for a campfire.

"First beach?"

"Honey, can you toast some muffins?"

"I can do this all day, marshmallow. I have a bright life ahead of me. You, on the other hand... I'm not so sure."

Scary Marshmallow Campfire Stories.