Marshmallow Munchers Gifts

Melting snowman roasting marshmallow on open fire.

Take seat. Nothing makes me happier than keeping people warm and cooking s'mores for them. Friendly fire.

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

Marshmallows

Peter Pan, the Utensil that Never Grew Up

Harsh Mellows.

"Dad! Dad! It's freezing out here! I wish we had a fireplace to get all cozy and roast marshmallows!"

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."

"My calculations are complete. We could toast 12,000 marshmallows every day for every person on earth for 36,000 years with one solar flare."

'The Torch Holder'.

'Marshmallows ready! Now for the roasting...'

"I don't know, maybe I'm just being mallowdramatic."

'Aren't these marshmallows just going to make us plumper for when the bears ultimately eat us?'

'Your father's a genius kids. First he discovered fire and now marshmallows.'

The lesser known active volcanoes.

"Really? You mean you’ve never smoked a joint?"

The Burning Bush: How God convinced Moses to Lead His people a.k.a. the origin of s'mores.

'Wait a minute - isn't this one yours and that one mine?'

"He must be a pro. He's got his own stick."

1% Cereal: Now with marshmallow dollar signs.

Marshmallow Roast

Emergency box in woods contains supplies for a campfire.

"First beach?"

Scary Marshmallow Campfire Stories.

"I can do this all day, marshmallow. I have a bright life ahead of me. You, on the other hand... I'm not so sure."

The Sacrificial Peep

'Get the kind with the little marshmallows.'

Zombie scout issues

"We're nearing The Sun, we're about to get out the marshmellows."

"Fortunately for Moses, he always carried a bag of marshmallows."

"We don't need airbags, I filled the car with marshmallows."

'Okay, the marshmallows will be frozen in a minute!' - 'Man, I really love Bar-B-Q's!'

Dragon toasts marshmallows

"When life gave him lemons, he always made lemonade!"

Thoughtful kiddies' midnight snacks overtax my bulging slacks … The load I haul back to my shack is bigger than the one I packed.