Mars Maniac Gifts

Mars probe discovers life similar to earth.

"Too controversial. Let's run a picture of another dry river bed."

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

'My feet are killing me.'

"No. I can't 'let it out a bit'. It's armour, you'll just have to go on a diet!"

"I'm weighed down with so many gadgets, I'll need a push to start me off."

Turning Japanese: I really think so.

'Spell checker!'

Giant slug attacks a city

"I witnessed something I can never unsee." "What happened, little buddy?" "Some guy walking out of the 'Wolverine' premiere shouted spoilers to the crowd that was waiting to see the second show." "A bunch of the fans who were dressed in costumes got so angry they attacked him." "I don't think I can ever unsee five Pyros and a Colossus beating a Happy Hogan with plastic flamethrowers." "Happy Hogan had it coming."

"He doesn't suffer fools gladly."

Cow Cong vs Toilet Rolls.

100k Desert Crawl

'Geez, I hate these fun runs!'

'We come in peace. Unless, of course, you have stuff that we want.'

'We're almost 1/8th of the way there.'

Oblivious at 20,000 Feet

"Sheesh... Missed a button again."

"Hang on - I'm not as young as I used to be. . .!"

'If you can't afford a media adviser the court will appoint you one.'

"Wow! - Do all Earth people look as tasty as YOU do?"

'I just wish that meant getting ready for the prom instead of the NCAA basketball tournament.'

'Is "I'll huff and I'll puff till I blow your castle down" the best intimidation we can come up with!!'

"Well, I guess this rock sample pretty much clears up any lingering doubts about life on Mars!"

Love Hurts

"Chills, Randy. I feel chills. And I can't move." "And I can't remember the last time my palms were this sweaty." "This must've been what people felt like when they heard the Allies were finally invading Normandy on D-Day." "No way any movie can live up to this hype." "Wolverine day is almost upon us." "We are about to embark upon the great crusade..."

'I could have sworn I put those moon rocks in my pocket...'

"Advertising is a simple business, Nathan. Always remember that less is more, except, of course, for those situations where less is actually less."

'I'll wait for Harold one more year. He hasn't crossed the finish line yet from the 1932 Olympic's marathon.'

Runner's High, Runner's Low

A tessellation of running figures.

"I want to be upfront. At this point, I'm only looking for a casual hookup of Frankenstein."

"You'll do laundry, you'll drink water...oh, and what's this? In the near future you'll clip your fingernails."