Married People Pillows

'I vowed not to go to bed angry.'

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

Cry babies.

Their marriage in jeopardy, Strawberry Shortcake and Billy Bob Banana Bread seek therapy.

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

"No, no - it was great. It's just that sometime I'd like to try it missionary style."

'The iceman cometh too soon!'

'Oh my God. I love it!'

"I didn't complain, when you crashed the computer."

"I can't decide if we're good people who are bad at communicating, or monsters who communicate perfectly."

"Will you stand by him through humiliating revelation after humiliating revelation, and then-once you're sure it couldn't possibly get any worse-when even more humiliating revelations come to light?"

"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."

'Do you promise to love, honor and remain co-dependent until death do you part?'

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

'Okay.. what the hell.'

'Well, he actually behaved pretty well for the first few minutes of the wedding ceremony....'

"She can walk the walk, but can she talk the talk?"

"According to this article, snoring can result in justifiable homicide."

"It started with a mutual interest in martial arts and developed into an interest in marital arts."

Mixed Doubles.

Try Mediation

Couples' therapy

Tunnel of Love/Tunnel of Marriage

"I heard they mate for life."

"The yellow spotted green bird, eats its body weight in bugs, and mates once every three years."

A married couple share the same pole vault.

'Apparently the stag party has gone into extra time.'

The Canine's version of cans tied to the back of a wedding car driving off with Cats attached

'Wait a minute - How do we break a tie?'

'Come on, you can make it work! You're supposed to be Lovebirds after all...'