Marriage Orchestrator T-Shirts

The wedding planner took care of everything.

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

"Just keep quiet and listen to what we have to say."

"As this is a civil ceremony, I'd rather you took the vows without swearing."

At times Richard dreaded coming home, as he knew he'd have to face the music.

Musical Web

'Sit, Rollover, Heel'

"I just figured she was holding all my calls. Turns out she's been running the company."

'Just because you're smarter than me doesn't mean I can't always be right.'

Richard and Wendy Kozier, of Saddle River, New Jersey, with U.N. Peacekeeping Contingent

Remote work

"Get me someone in Apologies, someone in Walkbacks, and send up the whole Scapegoating team."

"You forgot to say ‘and they lived happily ever after.'"

"I did not ram Preston Sturges down their throats."

"NAY!!"

"He's fluent in 24 computer languages and never says a bloody word to me."

'Well, Helen, you were right - our marriage contract does include an option year.'

'Share your innermost feelings or the remote gets it.'

"This time, Joe passes the gas, Sue cuts, Bob retracts and I grab the appendix... wait, better play... I pass the gas, Sue cuts, Lynne holds retractors, Bob grabs the appendix... wait........"

"I'm facing my fears in alphabetical order. How about you?"

Crab conductor.

"My husband wouldn't come so I brought my lawyer."

"Not right now, Sweetie, mommy's got her own 'Partisan Impasse' to deal with."

Allegro

'My wife doesn't understand that I need to unwind after work.'

Married Life - Wife carrying things for husband

"My husband works from home."

Battle of the Sexes

"Forget the children, consider staying together for the sake of your finances!"

Conductor.

'First, I'll give you my side of the story... and then Harry will repeat it.'

'I've been thinking - if you're allowed to quote your memorable sayings, I should be allowed to quote my memorable retorts.'

"The containment dome only muffled him."

'Am I the decision maker, dear?'

"Oh, our mortgage is okay -- We'd like to refinance our marriage."