Maritime Muse Pillows

'No Jake, I don't want to watch you do it again.'

For his next book, he would write an epic novel of the sea.

'Be honest - do I have someone stuck in my teeth?'

Ship of fools.

"Gasp! Pant! Is it good for you, Marjorie?"

Captain Eddie's New Boat: 'Don't over-think it, just go with the moment...ok, maybe a little thinking...'

"Call in a couple of months or sooner if you notice water in the Bilge"

Senta looks at portrait of Flying Dutchman

Sailor in Car.

"Eww - that whale's breath smells awful!" "You could use a breath mint yourself, lady!"

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

Message in a bottle being read by a fish

Men in office, pose as Rodin's: The Thinker. A sign on the wall reads: THINK.

Shallow End (Slightly innocuous statements) - Deep End (a little more weighty)

"If the universe is expanding, that's all the more reason to get back to the city."

'Could you tone down the smile just a little?'

A sailor in his little yacht bobbing on the waves

'Have you ever thought about doing a children's book?'

"I knew there was something wrong when he stopped reading the obituaries."

"Here's another one about Teddy bears."

'How come there aren't any peace heroes?'

Abstract portrait art.

"Who on earth would call on a landline? How rude!"

Dog Statue

Artist studies painting nudes by painting peeled bananas.

An octopus admiring an inkblot painting

"How much to insure my artifical leg?"

'Errors were made, things were said, people got hurt.'

'Couldn't you at least unbutton your top button?'

Artist's model for a painting of Hamlet turns up to the studio with a black eye

Sculptor: 'Okay, SMILE!'

Painting of a wave in a calm sea.

'...gone! The remains of the iceberg that sank the Titanic, to...'

The Bermuda Trapezoid: Where Ships Mysteriously Appear.

I may not have made any sales this quarter but I also haven't prevented and sales.