Maritime Memoirist T-Shirts

For his next book, he would write an epic novel of the sea.

'Are we there yet?'

When laundry ruled the waves.

'So Captain Ahab, I put it to you that you were deliberately stalking my client!'

Naval Veterans Drinking at Greenwich Pub

"Tell them we only have romaine!"

"As I was only saying the other day..."

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

Japanese Whaling

Frontispiece to 'Dombey and Son'

"The Captain really, really hates losing at shuffleboard."

"Will thee not sayeth uncle?!"

"He's a keeper!"

"Can I interest you in a great white?"

"Call me Ishmael."

"So who ordered the 'Yo-ho-ho and a bottle of rum on a dead mans chest'?"

On the plus side, I'd wager a lot of you folks back there had never seen an iceburg up close before.

Selfie of the Golden Hinde

Ever Given

"Someone switched off the freezer...it's melted."

"Have ye seen a whale that matches this swatch?"

"My new book will be an epic novel of the sea."

Help! Trapped on a desert island cartoon...

"Re-calculating, arrive at your final destination in six...five...four..."

Man tried to unload a ship in a bottle.

"I forget who, but he's somebody's kid."

'We should talk more.'

"....After ten o'clock is quiet time on board for the comfort of our passengers."

'What I need now is a good publicist...'

Fish near-death experiences.

"May I suggest hard a-starboard, or port, or whatever!"

'THINGMY ON THE PORT BOW!! You know, what's it called? Long and pointy... Very fast... TORPEDO ON THE PORT BOW!!'

Lighthouse switch

"Always remember - what happens in the pea-green boat stays in the pea-green boat."