Maple Syrup Critic Gifts

'Your diet is so bad that your arteries are all blocked, but the angioplasty should open things up and get the maple syrup flowing again.'

Dracula acquires a taste for maple syrup.

"Kids these days and their piercings..."

'Vanity, thy name is Maple.'

"We like to think he's experimenting with color and form, but his art therapist suggested we're not giving him enough candy."

"Do you have anything on the menu without maple syrup on it?"

'You are talking about health? Ha! My cig does not have calories, fat, cholesterol, carbohydrates and sugar!'

'Maple syrup? Really? Gosh, all these years I thought this was a mandatory drug screening!'

"Did you pack the Vermont maple syrup?"

Maple syrup and milk collection.

'Now his mother's gone, she's nowhere to slink off to and watch tripe on t'telly!

Children Who Have Given Up Soap For Lent

MADE IN CANADA "Buy Canadian"..."Eh!"

A bear steals maple syrup for his pancakes.

"Look at the hayseed! He's trying to milk a tree!

Reindeer using maple syrup bucket as a toilet.

"Nothing like fresh maple syrup."

"Bat spleen? Yes. Eye of newt? Sure. Toad warts? Absolutely. But adding pumpkin spice? That's disgusting!"

Don't move Gertrude. A little dash of maple syrup will sweeten you up.

Sugar Maple: Regular/Calorie-Reduced

Maple Festival & Pancake Breakfast

A Man Hangs Sap Buckets On The Lampposts

'And in today's health market - coffee is up, fats are mixed, and sugar continues its downward slide.'

"Well, thanks for the box of raisins, but we can't promise you a very good Trick or Treat rating on Yelp."

"We serve REAL maple syrup."

"It's just sap - it doesn't need a bandage and a hug."

'Ok. Have your maple sugar on a stick, but watch me call the exterminator!'

Bear sucks maple sugar from tree.

Maple Syrup Time in Canada

Tree Relief

New York's Newest Neighborhood- Little Vermont.

'It takes somewhere around thirty to fifty gallons of sap to make just one gallon of maple syrup, but only one bunny for rabbit stew.'

"We have no more wine from California. Would you like some maple syrup from Vermont?"

What year is this? Pardon? Aromatic. Full-bodied. Very approachable. Buttery. Swish swish swish. Yet with aggressive undertones, and an unforgiving aftertaste. Acidic after all. I should like another year. Something crisp yet dry. It's instant decaf coffee brewer with tap water! He's quite aggressive. And not so full-bodied. Pretentious people stink.

"Ha! The joke's on him. All I did was pee."