Manual Misreader Pillows

"And I'm telling YOU it looks exactly like the picture. See?"

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

"He built his own airplane from a kit."

"Something went wrong after you inserted tab A into slot B."

"Perhaps you wouln't have declared so many places 'worth a detour' if you'd held the map right way up!"

Maternity ward.

'To find out how to start your new mobile, please read the manual. T' read the manual, please start your mobile.

Mike had learnt by heart the whole training manual, apart from the most important bit.

Manual Worker

Manual Labor.

"According to the instructions, if the product is found to be faulty, dispose of it responsibly and purchase another."

'Experience is the wonderful knowledge that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.'

'Chef told me I had to have guard before I used the mixer!'

'What does the Scout manual say about this situation?'

Misery lit...

"Does it have a chapter on using the phone to call someone who can do it right?"

"I learned that Moses partied on the Red Sea today."

DIY motor repairs.

Mowing manual.

Apparently, there are manuals, and then there are MANUALS.

Law Books

"Step 1: Find Someone Who Knows How To Read Instructions, Dave."

Torn between taking the advice in her hiking manual and her impulse to help, Morgan Hirschi is frozen with indecision.

"It says here that if your gas barbecue hasn't been used all winter, you should check it over thoroughly before lighting it for the first time!"

'Okay I'll admit you do look foolish but on positive side you were only one letter out!'

A dog unable to open a can of dog food, holding a user's manual.

'Maybe the pilot crash landed here.'

"This is why you read the instructions."

"'Sideboard'? I thought it said 'sideboob'."

J G Farrell

Hammer Instructions

'The new, $800,000 copier we got at work only came with a 12-page book of instructions.'

'A large hole has appeared in the wall of the nudist camp - Police are looking into it.'

Large handbook for hand held PCs.

Job Safety - Valves.