Manual Misreader Pillows

"And I'm telling YOU it looks exactly like the picture. See?"

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

"He built his own airplane from a kit."

"Something went wrong after you inserted tab A into slot B."

"Perhaps you wouln't have declared so many places 'worth a detour' if you'd held the map right way up!"

Maternity ward.

Mike had learnt by heart the whole training manual, apart from the most important bit.

'To find out how to start your new mobile, please read the manual. T' read the manual, please start your mobile.

Manual Worker

Manual Labor.

IKEA Book

"According to the instructions, if the product is found to be faulty, dispose of it responsibly and purchase another."

'Experience is the wonderful knowledge that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.'

'Chef told me I had to have guard before I used the mixer!'

'What does the Scout manual say about this situation?'

Misery lit...

"Does it have a chapter on using the phone to call someone who can do it right?"

"I learned that Moses partied on the Red Sea today."

DIY motor repairs.

Apparently, there are manuals, and then there are MANUALS.

Law Books

Mowing manual.

Torn between taking the advice in her hiking manual and her impulse to help, Morgan Hirschi is frozen with indecision.

"Step 1: Find Someone Who Knows How To Read Instructions, Dave."

"It says here that if your gas barbecue hasn't been used all winter, you should check it over thoroughly before lighting it for the first time!"

'Okay I'll admit you do look foolish but on positive side you were only one letter out!'

A dog unable to open a can of dog food, holding a user's manual.

"'Sideboard'? I thought it said 'sideboob'."

'The new, $800,000 copier we got at work only came with a 12-page book of instructions.'

J G Farrell

Large handbook for hand held PCs.

'A large hole has appeared in the wall of the nudist camp - Police are looking into it.'

'Maybe the pilot crash landed here.'

Hammer Instructions

"This is why you read the instructions."