Managerial Maestro Gifts

"Experience is the wonderful knowledge that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again."

"This is bad work, Edwards! Bad! Bad! Bad! Bad!"

'I can't decide weather to have a feisty or a sassy management style.'

Executive's in and out boxes are labeled - One Ear and The Other.

Employees need to be treated like adults...

"I demand to speak with the manager!"

'Treat me easy this morning.'

'Are you worried about layoffs?'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

'Williams, we're not used to receiving such excellent ideas as these, so we'd like to tone them down a bit.'

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

'Finally! A meeting with one of the bigwigs.'

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

'Whoever said 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself' never had a room full of angry shareholders.'

"Why can't the rest of you be more like Rollins, here? He does his homework!"

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

"You've proven your worth a hundred times over. Let's try for a thousand."

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

We should take a break. Ron's eyes have turned into spinning rainbow wheels.

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

"Let's start with an icebreaker..."

"The meeting will come to order."

"Ok, do we agree the minutes of the last meeting?"

'How can we solve this problem by eating?'

"I need to see your budget proposal."

What can I do? He says it's his thinking cap.

'Ah, Galagher, we made good use of your proposal.'

'I'm sorry, but everyone is in a meeting.'

"I'll wait a moment for everyone's energy drink to kick in."

"Dammit, Johnson. You've got to start thinking outside of the box."

'Hey, look, I can stand up and shout, too!'