Magical Brew Master Gifts

'We spent centuries refining our eyes of newt and bat wing potion, and now we're expected to give it away for free?'

Dog looks perplexed as man has his head out the window taking in the beer smells.

Toadstools

'So, what do you think of my first attempt at making homemade beer?'

'I'll have you know sir, that we used the finest columbian coffee beans in that dishwater.'

"It's a new countertop draft system for craft beer!"

Beer Stall

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

"I've decided to make myself another cup of coffee!"

"Come to our microbrew party Saturday. It's B.Y.O.B. — Bring Your Own Brewery."

Bottle Distillery

'Beer brewery? No, I wanted the witches brew! Damn GPS.'

Lightest beer on the market. Carbonated with helium.

"That's us stocked up for the Wimbledon final then..."

My dad makes his own beer.

Tea Snob.

'There are shortcuts to making home brew, but taking a swig of malt extract and letting it ferment in your mouth isn't one of them.'

'Doesn't seem right somehow-REAL ale in PLASTIC glasses!'

Pasteur, in an early attempt to prevent wine from turning sour...pours sugar into the casks.

Ernie is a master brewer! He's highly skilled in every phase of the beer-making process! Business is booming at our craft beer pub! Ernie, are those ladies old enough to buy beer? I didn't ask for I.D. I didn't want to violate the no "dating" the customers policy. Ernie is an absolute genius about beer, but lacks common sense about everything else! (Published originally on Nov. 8, 2015.)

Daily Grind Coffee Cup

"Whole bean or ground relentlessly to dust?"

Joe's Bar - Two Kegs Any Style $49.95

'Ridiculously Expensive Coffee.'

'...tail of cat..tongue of toad and a good pinch of monosodium glutamate...'

Ugggghhh....eye of newt's off!

"I'm fine. It's coffee."

"Herbert, don't! This is a gourmet coffee shop! You order instant de-caf and there's going to be trouble!"

Ernie is a master brewer! He's highly skilled in every phase of the beer-making process! Business is booming at our craft beer pub! Ernie, are those ladies old enough to buy beer? I didn't ask for I.D. I didn't want to violate the no "dating" the customers policy. Ernie is an absolute genius about beer, but lacks common sense about everything else!

"And now from downtown!"

Alcohol Ingredients

'Why bother recreating the 5,000-year-old recipe fo the ancient Egyptians, when there's already one that old at the back of the fridge?'

"Eye of newt, wing of bat, blah blah blah, here's one I made earlier."

Can I get you another coffee?

"This is our coffeemaker room."