Magic Carpet Aficionado T-Shirts

'See the way that guy cut me up?'

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

'One eye of newt or two?'

Harry Potter learns some 'new tricks' on his first day enrolled in a public school.

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

'How do you like my new, deep plush carpet?'

"What the hell took so long?"

"Oh, sorry - Open Sesame, PLEASE."

What Harper Lee's REALLY been up to all these years

'...and remember, son, never throw up on an old carpet...wait until they get a new one!'

Aladdin's Less Magic Carpet Ride.

Spiro & Pusho illusionists

Movie Awards. That movie always comes alone and never stays for the after-party. It's an independent film.

'We're the first film ever in HD 3-D DOUBLE D!'

A Witch Consults Her Magic Mirror

"No one summons me anymore. They all have oil."

"Is it 'Measure once, cut twice?' Or 'Cut once, then measure?' Or maybe it's..."

"Hello. I'm director Bob ('Blue Fires') Munsey and this is screenwriter Doris ('Highway to Nowhere') Winslow."

'It's an experiment to stop time.'

'And the Award goes to...Ewww...him?'

"Then one day I thought, what the hell?! Maybe it's time I started granting a few of my own wishes."

'Notice the nice safety feature...crash-proof bumpers!'

Bookshop - Occult and the supernatural.

Houdini's Dog

"I'm wearing Donna Karan."

"Not lengthways you idiot!!"

'Your resume looks good. Let me hear some of your incantations.'

Oscars

'And who are you wearing?'

'Who are you trying to fool, that's a beach towel.'

Cannes Film Festival Heels Controversy

'What? When you cross a footballer with a mythical creature? A centaur forward!'

Carpet

Genie Gets a Good View on the Beach.